It's late and all of you are sleeping while I type this up. You are all small right now but there are a few things I want to make sure that you know in life.

1.) Always put God first. There will be things that come up that try to steal your attention but don't let them. When you wake up first thing in the morning, pray and read The Word. Spend your whole day talking to God. If you are having a hard day, talk to him. If you are having a good day, talk to him. If you are running late, don't stress it -- talk to him. If you are early, thank him. Clearly my point is -- Just talk to him. He's in every little moment of your life. He knows what is going to happen before you do. And sometimes those things that seem like the end of the world... Well, they can lead to some of the most beautiful things. Trust in Him.

2.) You are absolutely INCREDIBLE. No seriously you are. God made you to be exactly who you are for a reason. You were sent here at this particular time because God knew that the World needed someone just like you. You will change lives. Make sure you use that for good. 

3.) Look for the beauty in the small things. There will be so many things that this world will want to convince you is beautiful... But don't be mislead. True beauty is what is inside of someone. Not the outside. I want you to see the natural beauty around you. Both in people and in the world. Pay attention to the everyday little moments. Go out and experience Nature. When you are out and about in town, pay attention to the beautiful souls all around you that God sends into our lives -- sometimes in the form of a stranger. When you are older pay attention to those smiles and snuggles from your little ones. Those are the things that really matter. 

4.) Use your imagination. Never lose that ability. Anything is possible. Don't ever let anyone tell you differently. 

5.) Ask tough questions. Don't be afraid to do the hard work and do your own research into things. Don't just take someones word for anything. Even with the world at your fingertips, read books, seek out different perspectives ... Do a deep dive. Don't be afraid to go down the rabbit hole sometimes and then allow the Holy Spirit to Guide you. If you allow God to guide you, you will know what is right from what is wrong.

6.) Allow yourself to know what it feels like to be truly loved. I hope that your dad and I will be two people who make you feel that love -- but also, don't be afraid to get your heart broken a few times to find that one person that God has waiting just for you. Sometimes it takes learning what you don't want and being let down by people to realize what you do want and to find the one person who will do everything they can to never let you down. There will be people who will try to change you, those are not your people - just know that the right person won't try to change you... They will love you and all your imperfections.

7.) Love everyone. You don't always have to agree with peoples decisions. Everyone has their own story. Remember that " Jesus picked 12 outsiders no body would have chosen and he changed the world." If there is one thing that I have cherished in this life, it's that you should never judge a book by its cover.  You will find some friendships in some of the most peculiar of people. Cherish those. 

8.) Sometimes people just need you to listen. It can be hard not to voice your own opinions, but sometimes they just need to make their own decisions and have someone to talk to and who will give them a hug. Know when they need you to talk and when they just need you to listen. That is one of the best traits you will ever acquire. Also, don't take everything that someone says personal-- we all have bad days. They may just be frustrated and venting -- Just let them do it. You don't have to let it ruin your day. 

9.) Which leads me to my next piece of advice -- Respect Yourself. There will be those people in life who you can never please. There will be people who don't like you -- and they don't even know why they don't like you. That's their problem not yours. Know when to talk away. You will find your tribe -- and when you do, they will be unlike anyone you have ever met. They will want only good things for you -- and you will feel the exact same way about them. The world becomes a much more beautiful place when you surround yourself with people like that. 

10.) You are never alone. Even when the world tries to make you think that you are -- You aren't. I mean obviously your dad and I are always here for you... not to mention your other family members. But MOST IMPORTANTLY, as I said before -- God is always there. He can do some truly incredible things if you just trust and believe in him. I mean, look at my life. He has completely changed my life in ways I never thought possible.

11.)  You will most likely do some really stupid stuff when you are younger. We all have. And if someone tries to tell you they haven't.... well then.. they are probably lying or lived a really boring life. You only live once so make the memories... Don't be afraid. Obviously try to use your head as much as possible. But know that there is nothing in this world that you could do that would make me love you any less. I want to hear about your adventures and I hope you trust me enough to share them with me.

12.) Accidents Happen. In every aspect of your life, you will experience this. There will be things out of your control. But, God put a good head on your shoulder. Know what you can and can not control -- and then don't sweat the small stuff. 

13.) Always tell the truth. Even when you are tempted not to... It's always better if you do.  

14.) Your dad and I are always a phone call away - No questions asked. We want you to feel like in those moments when you are scared or even in the moments that you just need someone that you will have the feeling " I need to call my parents..." not "my parents are going to kill me..." Because like I said above, there is nothing that you could do that would make us love you any less. 

15.) Don't text and drive. Don't Drink and Drive. EVER. Period. It is NOT worth it. 

16.) Always Drive Yourself. If you can't, call mom, dad or a sibling. I can't tell you how many sticky situations I have gotten myself into riding with someone else. You are in control of what you are and are not exposed to when you have the ability to remove yourself from a situation. 

17.) 

I'm sure there will be many more and I will keep adding on as I think of them... But here is a start. 

Love you, 

Mom

Yes, when you go to the Allergist, they will tell you everything you want to know about allergies and how they affect your body... But there are a few things that they won't tell you.

1. They don't tell you that you will repeatedly have to tell your child sorry.

I can not tell you the amount of times that I have told Jack, "Sorry Bud..." since finding out about his allergies. He just replies back with, " It's okay, Mom." I know that it's not my fault but I can't help but feel so very sorry for him. I hate it when he feels left out. I never wanted anything like that for my children. 

2. They don't tell you how often your child will cry because something they once loved they can't have anymore.

Seriously, this is the most heartbreaking thing. You can find other alternatives but they are never the same, I promise.

3. They won't tell you that you will end up being the bad guy in every situation of you telling them they can't have something.

Yes, in the heat of the moment, Jack has told me that sometimes he wishes I was dead because Daddy would give him anything that he wanted if he just asked for it. The truth behind this is, His Dad would do everything in his power to keep him safe and healthy. But You have to remember, your child is hurting... sometimes it makes them feel better if they aren't the only one hurting. I'm not going to lie, sometimes these words sting a little in the moment... but he doesn't mean them. He usually apologizes afterwards.

4. They don't tell you that most people just really don't care that your child has an allergy if it doesn't directly effect them.

In a Perfect world, everyone would be more understanding and would be interested and proactive in finding out what your little one is and is not allergic to. They would make special meals/treats because they know that your little one will be there and won't want them to feel left out. They would care a little more about their feelings. But the truth is.... That is unrealistic. 

Until you have an immediate family member that you are constantly taking care of, and having to make sure they don't break out in hives or anaphylaxis due to something they ate, honestly you just won't get it. I mean, I don't think that I really got it until Jack was diagnosed. Not that I would ever want anyone to feel left out, because that was not the case at all.... I just didn't think about it. I was ignorant when it came to things like that because I just didn't know. I had no knowledge whatsoever... I wasn't trying to purposefully be an asshole. I just didn't think about it.

5. They don't tell you that you will have to watch your child with their internal struggles while they watch people around you eating foods they wish they could have. They also don't tell you that your child will always feel left out or that they will have to go without in some situations.

I have had numerous times, where I have had to pick up the slack in so many situations. I'm not complaining because that is my job as his parent... And I'm not judging.. I think that a lot of times people don't think about it. I hate to use the term "self centered" but aren't we all a little self centered at times. The truth is, I can't tell you the amount of times that someone has made something or brought something that Jack can't have to a family event or birthday party. Stuff that he absolutely loved before.... And it's torture for him... which leads me to the next point...

6. They won't tell you  that your child will be embarrassed every time you tell them they can't have something in front of anyone. 

They won't tell you that it will take a toll on both of you. Because both of you just want him to feel normal. They don't tell you that they will grow up way to fast because of it. They won't be able to enjoy that carefree life that so many children do. 

7. They don't tell you that your child will start to withdraw from social outings because they " can't have the food anyways..."

When you are allergic to foods, especially with the list that Jack was given, It can be extremely overwhelming. When we first started eliminating foods, he felt like there was nothing good that he could eat. He would get invited to birthday parties and would tell me he didn't want to do. He wouldn't want to go to family get togethers. I tried to help in ways that I could, buying him a substitute for cupcakes and other goodies that would be at parties... But it just wasn't the same... They didn't have the colorful frostings and things like the other ones did... You could put a toy on top but it was still "different".

8. They don't tell you that it is a learning curve. You will definitely mess up a few times. You may accidentally promise something and then realize that it has one of the ingredients he is allergic to in it and immediately take it away. 

I learned this the hard way when on Mother's Day, we went out to eat at Outback Steak House. I felt like we were doing really good. We ordered Jack a steak cooked in butter, steamed veggies and a salad. He was on Cloud 9 when he discovered we had found something he could have. When dessert time came around, we decided to go get ice cream from the store afterwards. News Flash!!! Most ice creams (besides Tillamook - which we learned afterwards) contain High Fructose Corn Syrup. Yea, so Jack cried and cried for a long time. That was when we found out that he could have Frozen Yogurt from Yogurtland. He was on cloud 9 again.... But there is definitely a learning curve there...

You are going to have those tough times that the Allergist won't tell you about. I highly recommend connecting with some other moms on Facebook who have children with allergies. It was amazing what I learned from them. They had already been going through the process for a while and could help me with what products worked for what allergy. I honestly am so blessed to have so many amazing women in my life who give me strength on the hard days. 

I hope this helps someone. 

Have a great day!